Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Wednesday's Words, by Morgan Ashbury


I used to hate it when older folks would say, “back in my day...” And yet, I seem to have, well, if not those exact words falling from my lips on a regular basis, at least the sentiment they engender surrounding me a lot.

My daughter is the youngest of my kids, thirty-six at her last birthday. She herself has one son, and he and his fiancé and their two babies live with her. She works in the community as a PSW—personal support worker. I believe in the U. S. the same position is called Nurse’s Aid.

Now, I will grant that some of her work days are stretched out—once in a while she may start as early as 5:30 and not finish until 8 at night. But on those days, most usually, she has three or four hours free in the middle of the day, and those hours are generally spent napping.

And yet, all I hear from her is how tired she is. And she says that nearly every single day.

My second daughter is also tired all the time. Of course she’s older than her sister by a whole year.

My question is, whatever happened to stamina?

When I was 36, I was a mom with two kids at home, aged 13 and 12 (my oldest had already left the nest). I worked outside the home at a full time job, and while the kids weren’t small, they were still work. Whether it was dealing with those kids and homework and trying to get them to do their chores, or the cooking, the laundry, and house cleaning, it was pretty much all on me. And yeah, I had days when I would have loved some extra sleep, but I didn’t feel even half as tired as the generation behind me seems to feel.

My beloved said it’s the same way where he works. The young bucks, as he calls them, come dragging into work some mornings, groaning with the horror of it all. They are all so tired all the time—and none of them feel the least bit shy about telling you how tired they are, all the time.

Now, either everyone in this current generation of 20 to 40 year olds is suffering from a severe lack of iron, or they’re just not making people the way they used to.

Then again, there might be one other factor at play: their misuse of subconscious minds could be at fault.

One rule for self-conduct I’m most fond of is the one that says you should never trash talk yourself in any way. And the reason you shouldn’t has to do with your subconscious mind. I’ve heard it said and believe it to be true that your subconscious doesn’t differentiate between the truth and a lie, it just works at making your words reality. So if you say you’re a loser, your subconscious mind works at making you one. If you say you’re a winner, guess what? Same thing, it works at making you one.

I know this is true, because there were times in the past when I focused on the discomfort I was in every day. Anyone who has it knows arthritis is a very harsh task master. But I have learned not to talk about the pain, and for the most part, not even to think about it. Because when I don’t, then it’s better.

So I wonder if it could be that these young people focus so much on how tired they are, that all they feel is even more tired. I asked my beloved if he thought it could be so, and he agreed it was not only possible, but probable.

I also know what else he thinks, and it can be summed up like this: You’re tired? So what? We’re all tired. Get on with it. Life’s hard? Yeah, funny how that works. Get on with it.

A man of simple beliefs is my husband. And we tend to agree on most things—and nothing more than this.

Everything in life—especially how you feel—is a decision.



Love,

Morgan





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